How the Times Have Changed
This week I wanted to explore how the inception of online connections changed the trends in monogamy in the 2000’s through present day.
So – Since the inception of chat rooms, the internet became practically a breeding ground for naughty behavior. We quickly learned – in the 90’s when we started to have the ability to chat and email with others that the definition of infidelity needed to be redefined to include consideration for online relationships. I remember this shift happening and a lot of conversations around it – like storylines on prime time tv which quickly became fodder for a like your Sally Jessie Raphaels. Do you remember this Amanda?
AOL in the 90’s I remember was this insane space to connect suddenly with anyone and it was the wild, wild west. There were no restrictions – I mean, Amanda, you have seen PEN15 – this was real. Parents had no idea that this was like a cesspool of potential stranger danger and most kids (myself included – particularly coming from a relitively sheltered upbringing) had literally no concept of this new weird world around them. My sister Stephanie would kill me if I didn’t mention this story. So in 1996 Swingers the movie rose to widespread popularity when I was 16 (BTW doesn’t hold up) – it was also when AOL chat was sweeping the nation and we were all https://kissbrides.com/russian-women/ setting up our screen names. So I chose Swinger as my handle after this trendy word and AOL gave me some assorted numbers since there were already some “Swingers” – So I was Swinger689. Naturally from the Midwest in the 90’s and very naive we really had no idea that I basically had the ultimate chat name to get propositioned and had no idea that Swinger also was some other more sexual meanings. Everytime I was in a chat room dudes were always trying to take me into a private chat – i kinda thought that was normal – and i always declined because of course i had no interest in talking to strange men – I mean I am pretty sure I had my age in my profile – like I am 16 or 17 YO female so that was just kindling for the creeps.
Anyway – The newfound ability to covertly have conversations created a whole new set of circumstances and definitions of what “infidelity” means – and even the more lazy or socially distanced cheaters had access to potential cheating options. So this definition had to include a romantic and/or sexual relationship with someone other than the spouse or significant other, which begins with an online contact and is maintained mainly through electronic conversations that occur through e-mail and chat rooms.
The Polls are In
Last year (so in 2020), a YouGov poll found that some 17% of users across all dating apps were there to cheat on their current partners.
More Monogomy Moves
There was an interesting trend in Monogamy happening in the 2000s – essentially before the early aughts and through the 90’s people 18-55 were more likely to have extra the lines essentially CROSSED and it switched. And the older folks reported more affairs – and like quite a lot more – according to a survey done by Institute for Family Studies while the 18-55 severely declined.
So this was an ongoing trend happening -right on up to the pandemic – But then COVID hit and all bets were off and marriages showing cracks. Which helps me slide right into my main segment.
Ashley Madison – the online dating site founded in 2002 for arital affairs is reportedly having a boon year because of the pandemic. So you may remember Ashley Madison – who had a seriously insane hack that destroyed a lot of lives in 2015. Anyone who remembers this may ask – woah are they still around? Yes, they are and doing quite well may I add.